From: ERIK W. & KIM T (kimtoussaint_at_yahoo.com)
Date: Sat Aug 23 2008 - 19:08:11 PDT
"A Visit from Ben"
( Continued from Shawn's "Nature vs. Nurture" )
___________________________________
Location: BAJOR
Scene: Beach
Stardate: 2.80823.1852
____________________________________
Standing on a rock formation that jutted out into the green
water of Bajor's Southern ocean, Mav pointed down the beach.
“Looks like you've got company.” They turned to see Ben making
his way towards them.
He wore his uniform, which wasn't especially unusual. He
tended to wear it all day if he was going to be on duty
at all, regardless of what else he was doing. Daisy had made
fun of him for the habit many times in the past, but she
didn't really mind. He never looked quite so like himself
as when he was in uniform. Nonetheless, today he looked
out of place on the beautiful beach under the Bajoran sun.
“We'll leave you alone.” Erek said, motioning to the
others, and it was only then that Daisy realized she's
been staring.
“No.” she said suddenly, grabbing the Bajoran's arm. “Stay.”
Cade flinched as he observed Daisy's reaction. Part of him
couldn't help wishing the sky would cloud up and this young,
handsome man who obviously mattered to Daisy would immediately
be struck by lightening. The older man did as he usually
preferred, though - and covered with humor. He scooped up
Daisy's daughter and suggested they go look for teega worms
to hide in LJ's bed and avoided eye contact with the woman
who had shared a bed with him the night before.
Daisy's heart lept when Mav told her Ben was planning to
visit, but actually facing him was another matter. Part
of her longed for him, as it always did, longed to be held
in his strong arms and feel his warmth and know everything
was going to be fine. But part of her remembered the last
time they were together and wanted him to hurt like he hurt
her. She decided then, she wasn't going to let this be easy
on him. He would sue for peace, and she would forgive him,
she knew, but she would make him earn it.
“Hi.” he addressed the group when he reached them. Further
away, tip-toeing between tide pools on the rocks, Erika
and Cade said nothing. Ben may have intended to continue,
but Daisy didn't allow it.
“Captain Kenta.” she began, business on her face.
“Commander.” he replied in a tone that admitted he
deserved that.
Mav glanced back and forth between the two of them, sensing
the tension, and started to snigger.
“Is there something I can do for you?” she asked stiffly,
ignoring Mav's glee. The crusty Marine teasingly made a
shivering sound - as if the tension between Daisy and Ben
had actually managed to lower the temperature of the lovely,
warm and sunny beach.
He looked over at the marine only briefly, and then his
eyes settled back on Daisy, “Walk with me.”
She hesitated a moment before turning to the others.
“I won't be long.”
They walked along the beach in silence for a while and she
listened to the waves. More than once she noticed him
looking at her, taking her in. The bathing suit she wore
wasn't as skimpy as it could be, but it was flattering,
and she enjoyed having his eyes on her. She made sure to
swing her hips more then normal, enough to be noticeable
without being obvious.
Finally his voice broke the steady rhythm of the waves.
“I owe you an apology.” he began. “The way I acted last
time wasn't fair. I was taking out my grief and guilt and
you, and you deserved better.”
“You're damn right I deserved better.” She countered.
“You wouldn't talk to me. I was worried about you, I wanted
to help, and you shut me out completely like I didn't
matter, like you didn't even know me.”
She stopped walking and looked at him. “Do you have
any idea how that made me feel?”
“I know.” He answered quietly, “and for what it's
worth I'm sorry. I'd take it back if I could, all of
it. That's not how I wanted us to end.”
“End?” Daisy was surprised and exasperated by the
word. “You don't really think we're over? Ben, we're
both adults here. I know you weren't trying to hurt me.
You were upset about Martin and feeling weak and
helpless because of your injuries. I know that.”
This wasn't exactly how she's planned for the conversation
to go, but he had surprised her. “I'm still pissed, but you
apologized. You'll kiss my ass for awhile, and we'll move
on to the same arrangement we've had before. You'll have
your life, I'll have mine - but if we get the
chance.....”
“You don't understand.” Ben raised his hand, stopping her....
“I can't do this anymore.”
“You can't do this?” If she'd been mad before she was
furious now. “What part of this exactly can't you do? The
part where you sleep with me once every few months and hardly
talk in between? The part where your career always comes
first? How about the part where I do everything can to make
things comfortable for you, and then things like this
happen.” She threw up her arms.
“Daisy.” Ben said, reaching for her hand.
“No!” she hissed, pushing him away. “I swore after Zuri
that no man would ever have that kind of power over me
again. I would never change my plans or uproot myself and
my children to make things right for a man and I did
exactly that for you. I changed my entire life when I
accepted the assignment you gave me...and I thought that
mattered to you. I thought I'd gained your
respect as an officer and that maybe there was a chance... "
she choked back tears and Ben groaned awkwardly.
“You *have* earned my respect.” Ben answered, holding
back tears of his own. “It's just...” He paused for a moment,
and Daisy waited while he took a long breath. “During the
battle of GATEWAY I was thinking about you. I needed to
be focused and I wasn't, and people died because I made
a mistake.” at that a tear did escape.
"And if I wasn't in command of GATEWAY?" Daisy
offered cautiously.
“It wouldn't matter" he sighed. " if you resigned and
stayed here forever, or moved to the delta quadrant. The
problem is that I care about you. My ship, my crew, the
Federation, they're all counting on me to be focused, and I
can't do that while still having these feelings for you.”
“How very 'vulcan' of you." she teased weakly.
"This is not a joke, Daisy." Ben chided her.
Daisy groaned and then she pulled him into a hug and
whispered, "You're making a mistake, doing this to
yourself and to us."
He returned the hug tentatively, but only for a
moment. “I don't have a choice, Daisy.”
She pulled away, sniffling awkwardly and then
gave him a defiant look.
"Well, go on then. "
He blinked, surprised. She smoothed her hair,
crossed her arms over her ample chest and added
"Consider me 'over you'."
He couldn't help a weak half-hearted smirk, thinking
she was cracking a joke. He sighed patiently, thinking
he should try one more time to make her understand his
decision.
He started to speak and she hissed, "Shaddup. I don't
wanna hear it. This is stupid. You're not the man I
thought you were if you think you can live this way,
cutting yourself off and living only half a life for the
sake of your career. You're not the man
I thought I loved. You're not even a friend of mine.
Not anymore."
Ben swallowed. “I understand.” The word hung in the air for
what seemed an age.
“Damn you, Ben.” She said finally, shaking her head.
Then, she turned and walked away.
His legs wouldn't move for a minute. He just stood there,
watching as Daisy headed up the beach to her house with others
following after her to make sure she was ok.
Knowing she wouldn't be alone and resigned that he was doing
what he had to do, Ben finally turned and left the way he came.
________________________________________________________
NRPG: A short, simple JP done between Erik Waltz and myself.
I'm still alive. I haven't read the new mission yet - I just wanted
to tie up a loose end with Erik regarding the history between our
characters. Then, I'm giving myself a bit more time to recover from
my surgery.
Lortabs are lovely pain pills. I'm still on them every 4 hours for
the sinus pain and the "Punched in the face" feeling all around my
nose. LOL
My breathing has improved tremendously, though! It's incredible!
I'm starting to smell and taste things I'd forgotten about during the
many months I'd spent with all that abnormal tissue obstructing my
sense of smell and imparing my breathing! What a trip!!
My boys go back to school on Monday. However, my husband is taking
a vacation from work for our anniversary on the 25th - and to celebrate
making it through my surgery. So - I'll have him around hogging my
attention for a bit. That means my "Plan" to have Daisy returning to
duty around mid-september still stands. So - I hope you'll all go ahead
and enjoy the time between now and then working on Ran's mission. I'll
do my best to catch up and jump in as soon as I'm able.
Kim Toussaint AKA Commander Daisy Byrne Davidson, M.D.
Commanding officer of GATEWAY STATION
"To command is to serve, nothing more and nothing less." - Andre George Malraux (1901 - 1976)
Kim Toussaint AKA Commander Daisy Byrne Davidson, M.D.
Commanding officer of GATEWAY STATION
"To command is to serve, nothing more and nothing less." - Andre George Malraux (1901 - 1976)
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